Depression is the absence of joy. The absence of feeling. But hope, however small, can keep the heart from stopping.
We sat on a bench by the river as the morning sun glistened over the rolling waves. People strolled by, smiling and talking on their morning walks. The wind wisped by, brushing my cheek and ruffling my long hair. Everything seemed light and happy – everything but me. I could not bring myself to smile, nor speak about happy events and things. All I could do was stare into a space I was not a part of, outside a window that separated my world from theirs.
All I wanted was to be a part of that world. All I wanted was to be happy. But anger got the best of me because no matter where I was or who I was with, I could not seem to escape depression. I told her I just wanted to leave, as I came to my senses again, that not even a beautiful morning by the river could change my state.
We walked back to the car in silence, leaving the greenery behind.
One day, I thought.
It wasn’t today, but one day I would be able to feel that sun that glowed on that rippling river. And I knew I would be able to feel the light breeze of the morning touch my skin. And one day soon, that light and airy girl would return like the wind. And although I could not see or touch it then, I knew one day I would feel again.
Lesson Learned:
We are bound by space and time, but hope is not. Hope you can’t see, but hope is real. Without hope, the heart fails.